Yoite uses a forbidden technique called "Kira." Forbidden for the fact it slowly kills the user and kills those around him/her, as well as the fact it implements the mentality of the person, it has a number of very severe side-effects on the user and the victim. At the expense slowly losing their five sense, stunted growth, and loss of life - a Kira user can fire off parts of their ki to use as a weapon. It causes large explosions, but it also seizes control of a person's muscle/bone and can more-or-less explode from the inside out. So, yes, it is very gory. Similarly, the Kira user can implant pieces of their ki to let loose at any time in the victim. Yoite faked he had left parts of his ki in Miharu's friends initially as leverage for continued cooperation, but also revealed the fact that if he died - he would in fact (honestly) take them with him if he did. So, naturally, because the topic is so sensitive in several areas? I plan on making an opt-in post and detailing in full the fact they don't have to interact with that part of him (not that they probably would, anyway - Yoite has no interest in telling irrelevant people - never mind, for a time, the relevant. I can't exactly promise that he wouldn't necessarily go after those who threatened him directly, though! Hence, the opt-in). Similarly, I'll be handling the sex issue as delicately as it should be. It shouldn't cause any concern, because Yoite's absolutely fixed in the fact he's a "he", by the by. This is what he was always called by Kairoushuu, and so he's adopted it for himself and knows for himself. Rest assured, though? This will absolutely never come up. In fact, the only references that would even remotely poke through would easily be mistaken for common modesty to any passerby who has no knowledge of Nabari. Other examples? Well, he has negative reactions to those calling him a girl or those who call him cute. Again, this could be taken easily as he's just generally offended by the insinuation. Not anything deeper. So, again, I will be handling this very delicately and no mentions will ever be made of it.

(PRIVATE ENTRY:)

Ah, I see. This noisy thing, it won’t leave me even if I ask it to.

Yukimi’s computer…

Will it leave traces of me? If it will go entirely… [ a long pause: ] I don’t want it, still. I don’t want to use something so pointless. Even if it goes to no one, I don’t want to talk to it.

I don’t – [ there’s another long pause. before the text starts to scroll again. a little more slowly. as though he’s realized – no, even if he doesn’t want to talk of anything at all, he doesn’t want to cause more issues for anyone. even if this will never return the endless years of debt. even if he can give them absolutely nothing in return -- ] My fingers… They’ve lost a good portion of sensation. It takes longer.

[ another, longer pause. it seems to demonstrate, without demonstrating. to himself. his fingers – like this, it’s harder to register correctness. muscle memory is only so helpful. even now -- ] Even when doing this, it bothers me a little. Though I keep thinking of what I had before, I notice small things. Like this, I –

[ abrupt. the cursor flickers. shudders to a halt. almost as if he’s noticed -- ]

Yukimi’s computer is cleared up.

[ he can disconnect. ]

Under his hands, many had fallen. (Many had crumpled or cried. Many had spoke out in hushed whispers. Death with a face and cold, colder eyes. Death with a voice and Death that could speak. Death that was Death that was and was not alive. Hiding away amid wreckage. Listening to milling feet. Kill me. We're worthless. Kill me. We've always been worthless.)

Under his hands, many had drawn back. (Born into a role, he followed it. The only tangibility. The only absolution. The only consistency. He clung to it. Easier to find himself wrapped in something, then wrapped in nothing. In slowed declarations. Of fewer who would challenge him. His body. His ideas. His mind. You've never been alive. You're no one. You're --)

Under his hands, Yoite had found a deep well of water. A deep forest of thought. An unending desire, in darkness, to vanish. To have never existed, at all. (He wants more than anything - to leave nothing. He wants, more than anything, to reach that goal. First, by way of offer. Learn Kira. Next, by way of practice. Each time it's used, you'll lose a little more of that life. Next, by way of -- )

Time unwound slowly and quickly. It dragged its feet and spiraled, like small creatures stuck in webs. (And he could feel his life vanishing. Piece by piece. Could feel his life draining, inch by inch. And it was only when... ) And it was only when, in one night, Yukimi spoke about the Shinrabanshou. (Spoke, about the one thing that could grant any wishes. Spoke, about the one thing that could know All Things in Nature. Spoke -- )

Under his own hands, Yoite locked himself inside himself. Hid behind doors and behind shell, and knew and thought how one might come to erase himself. How one might convince someone so powerful to look upon a monster like him. A monster like himself. And --

Dissolve him.