APPLICATIONS -- 2010; 001

[tripled_mods]

THIS APPLICATIONS POST IS CLOSED. Please direct your attention to the new one here!

Comments

sasuke uchiha | NARUTO | 5/???

[copywheels.livejournal.com]

On the other hand, he has a crippling inferiority complex. As soon as someone manages to beat him, Sasuke is consumed by self-doubt and fears of being weak; when he realises that Naruto is progressing faster than him and already quite possibly better than him, he panics. One simple defeat throws his whole world off-balance and he starts to question his strength, even his whole life - he immediately decides that he's "not good enough" and pushes himself frantically to reach a point where his superiority can rightfully settle in again. He's so insecure about his strength that he feels the need to constantly challenge others or stand up to enemies just to prove his worth to himself; he needs to know that he's the strongest, and if he's not, then he has to fix that. It's something that lingers from his childhood, when he was always lost in Itachi's overwhelming shadow, and something that has only gotten uncontrollable since then because of his duty to fight and kill his prodigious older brother.

Revenge is the highest priority to Sasuke; everything else only exists so that he can kill Itachi. His life is only important because he needs it to get revenge. Almost everything he does is just to get that slightest bit closer to being able to kill his brother - almost. Strangely, he'll willingly put his life on the line to save Naruto, Sakura and Kakashi without meaning to get stronger by it; this is because they're his only friends, he loves them, and when Sasuke loves, he does so with his entire being. He doesn't think about it, but he will instantly protect them without needing to consider it, and fears of losing his life and never killing Itachi only come after he's already taken the bullet for them. Still, there are also other times when he'll be careless with his life simply for the sake of testing his own strength, because he's come to believe that if he's weak enough to die in a battle then he didn't deserve to live anyway. Revenge is his life and his purpose, and until that day, strength is his purpose and reason to exist. Without it, he may as well just die, which is why he risks his life fighting Gaara - to prove that he deserves to live. He is willing to do absolutely anything for revenge, and for the power he needs to exact that revenge, leading to him joining Orochimaru.

Although most of his coldness and bad attitude is intentional, Sasuke is also extremely socially awkward. For the five years following the Uchiha massacre, he refused to let anyone in, and barely even spoke to or associated with anyone during that time; he's almost forgotten how to deal with people, but he isn't unreachable. Naruto manages to pry his heart open, and after that, he's willing to let a very small amount of people become close to him, and those people he trusts and loves with all his heart - but even then, he has no idea how to be friendly or sociable, which is why he has no desire to try. Touch is foreign to him and usually gets an adverse reaction, as does any sort of gentle and loving action or behaviour; Itachi's betrayal left a lot of emotional scars on him that will never heal, but he does care about people, even if he doesn't know how to show it. Not to mention the fact that he's been taught that hate makes you strong, and his own conclusion of bonds making you weak - he wants his friends close, but not too close. This all bundles up and usually leaves him with a very tsundere attitude towards his few friends. He doesn't accept strangers too well, either, and doesn't take well to being approached with an immediately friendly or intimate attitude. He seems to think that Kakashi, Naruto and Sakura are the only people he will ever need.